Food For the Bereaved

Tuesday's Food Tip

This may seem like a rather strange food tip. But this past week my family experienced a terrible loss. My brother's 19-year-old son went in to take a shower and collapsed and died. His heart just stopped beating and nothing anyone (including the paramedics) could do for him could get it started again. No drugs or alcoholic, or anything strange were involved. The doctors suspect he had a heart defect that had gone undetected and it suddenly caused his heart to just stop.

I can't begin to explain how this has "broken" my brother's own heart. And my entire family has been grieving FOR him and the rest of his immediate family, as much as WITH them, over this unbelievable loss.

As friends, family, and business associates from far and wide flocked to my brother's house with food, I realized that it might help others who want to help friends in a similar situation, so here are some tips when preparing and sending food to the home of the bereaved:

1) People send a little of anything and everything to the home of the bereaved family, but it's wonderful to have an actual "meal." If you can, prepare a one pot meal, like chili, soup, or even a pot roast with all the trimmings (potatoes, onions, carrots, etc.). That way, the family will have a nourishing meal readily available, not only for themselves, but for the extended family that will come to town at this time.

2) A platter of cold cuts, breads, and vegetable sticks is most welcomed. Anyone at the home who is hungry can make themselves a sandwich, or lunch can be prepared quite easily for a large crowd.

3) Comfort foods are most appreciated - Platters of chocolate chips cookies are soothing to everyone and there is no such thing as "too many cookies."

4) Try to send some foods that can be frozen if they aren't eaten right away. My brother and his family received so much food, they were worried about it spoiling before they could eat it all. A frozen casserole or soup that can be thawed out later will be much appreciated by the family.

5) Fresh fruit salad is wonderful if you know the family isn't receiving this from others. It needs to be eaten soon after the family receives it, and they won't be able to eat 3 or 4 fresh fruit salads, so be sure they aren't inundated with these before you decide to make one for them.

6) Try to send the foods in disposable containers whenever possible. That way, the family won't have to keep up with the containers and see that they are returned to the rightful owners later.

Also, if you're a member of the extended family or a very close neighbor or friend, check to make sure the house has everything the family will need to keep going for a while - this means the refrigerator is stocked with milk, juice, and butter, and there is bread and cereal in the pantry, and enough toilet tissue and laundry detergent for the next few days. During this time of loss, so many arrangements need to be made. The family won't have time to think about food or other little necessities, so you can do that for them.

If you have other tips you'd like to share, please leave your comments.

Take care.

Suzanne Lieurance
Owner, Three Angels Gourmet Co.